femifist

I identify as a bisexual.  I have identified this way for many years.  I came out to myself at the young age of 10, to close friends at 16, to all but family at 18, and then finally to family at 25.  

There are a lot of misconceptions about bisexual people and I’d like to briefly disprove some of these myths.

First of all, bisexuality is defined as the sexual/emotional attraction to men, women, or perhaps transgendered people.  Actually engaging in sex with a person of either sex DOES NOT define a person’s sexuality.  Some bisexuals date and sleep with women, men, or neither, but still identify as bisexual.  For example, I came out as bisexual to myself at 10 years old, but did not date a woman until I was 25.

Bisexuals are not nymphomaniacs that have to simultaneously sleep with men and women.

Scientists have proven that different hormonal levels in the brain may effect sexuality, but some people still believe that sexuality is a choice that is affected by rejection of a parent.  Of course, I’m going with the scientific theory.  I’m sure that I was born bisexual.  My girlfriend is a lesbian and she is sure that she was born that way as well.  I do not know any LGBT person that claims to have chosen that fate.  I would not have chosen to be alienated, harassed, and threatened in middle school.

Most bisexuals do not have a 50/50 attraction to men and women.  Sometimes bisexuals are more attracted to one sex and sometimes the levels of attraction change over time.

People often make assumptions about one’s sexuality based on appearance.  Because there is no stereotypical bisexual look, there is always an assumption made that I am straight or lesbian.  Most often people assume that I’m straight.  Please get in the habit of not being presumptuous as it can be hurtful to people–even straight people.  Rather than asking someone “Do you have a boyfriend (or girlfriend if person appears to be male)?”–perhaps you could ask “Are you seeing anyone?”  Believe me, it will be less awkward for everyone.

Resources for bisexuals:

http://www.biresource.net/  (Boston)

http://www.rslevinson.com/gaylesissues/resources/glc_bisexual.htm

http://www.main.org/binetaustin/resources_other.html  (Austin)

http://www.religioustolerance.org/hom_refe.htm  (If you are looking for a gayfriendly church)

http://www.connexions.org/Links/Link210a.htm

http://www.ibiblio.org/cheryb/women/resource/lesbian-int.html

http://serf.org/~jon/soc.bi/faq/hotlist.html

http://www.babn.org/anythingthatmoves/resources.html

http://www.google.com/Top/Society/Gay,_Lesbian,_and_Bisexual/Bisexual/

http://www.einet.net/directory/61988/Bisexual.htm

Trackback URI | Comments RSS